Facebook: Beware Of The Players

In this new age of rapid-fire communication via electronics, an individual like the Player can’t mindlessly adopt every new trend that comes along without considering the benefits and consequences. The likes of Facebook, MySpace and Twitter have allowed us all to keep tabs on one another, and while this can be used to the Player’s advantage; he must also use the same strategy he employs in other areas of his love life. It’s not about simply putting yourself out there to brag about your conquests (and reel in more); it’s about playing the field appropriately in a virtual landscape. This requires a surprising amount of maintenance and precision because even the slightest slip up can fly across the internet at shocking speeds -- much to your chagrin. One day, some random girl you've never met before and who claims to be “a friend of a friend of a friend” gives you a nasty look followed by the cold shoulder. We’re here today to avoid such frustration.

Not everything should be public knowledge

You do have plenty of control over your profile and what visitors can see, so it’s best to keep certain things private. Whether it’s Facebook or MySpace, you need to limit the scope of your personal experiences and lifestyle. Simply give visitors a taste without launching into some ill-advised relation of your latest escapade. One has to remember that the Player is discreet; he is not the loud-mouthed, obnoxious braggart who will tell anyone with functional ears just how many women he has picked up. This is adolescent behavior and the true ladies' man kisses and never tells. Now, virtual social services are dangerous because it may seem less personal; it may seem more private because you’re sitting alone with nothing but a screen in front of you. But it’s best to picture that screen as thousands of pairs of greedy eyes. 
By The Player

Chinua Achebe's Memorial In London

Nigerians living in the United Kingdom have held a memorial to celebrate the life and times of the late Prof Chinua Achebe. The occasion which began with a church service at All Saints Church, New Cross Road, London was followed by a night of celebrations at the Millwall Football club sports hall. Although the memorial began yesterday night, it saw the early hours of today and featured lots of cultural displays including performance by the Madees and the Aku Ruo Uno cultural dance by Anambra Women. Yours truly was there and my camera was handy!

Show Some Love!

As the world gets ready to mark yet another Children’s Day, your number 1 online retailer,Jumia.com has introduced a charity give-back initiative using its social media platform. “In celebrating this year’s children’s day, we at Jumia in addition to other onsite initiatives will be giving back to the less privileged children in the society using our Facebook and Twitter pages. This is an initiative that will require the support of our friends on social media, how? It starts with a like or follow on Facebook and Twitter respectively. We are very grateful to our friends who have supported the cause so far; as we speak we have already raised N5, 877 in the first day. ”, this was according to Opeyemi Adetomiwa, community manager at Jumia.com.

All it takes is for every ‘like’ on the Jumia Facebook and ‘follow’ on their Twitter pages, N1 will be donated to a charity on children’s day. SO, all you need do to put a smile on the face of that needy child this Children’s Day is to ‘like’, ‘follow’ and ‘share’ with your own friends, it’s that simple.

Click here to start ‘liking’, you could be the reason for that kids smile.

Surviving Infidelity: Stage 2

Repairing a Relationship and Restoring Trust

If both parties decide that they want to try and save their marriage, the next phase is the most difficult.

To begin with, it requires understanding the motivation underlying the affair and taking steps to change the factors which led the unfaithful partner to cheat.

People often lack insight into their own behavior, and if they do understand why they cheated, they often do not want to disclose this information with a spouse - thinking that doing so will only cause more problems.  However, if the real issues are not identified, they are less likely to get resolved.

And by approaching this problem as a couple, it can empower a spouse, who has been cheated on, by providing a sense of control.  Working together to fix the problem can bring back a sense of certainty or reassurance, which is important when trying to restore trust.

In addition to identifying the motivation underlying the affair, it is essential to candidly discuss the details of what happened.  Again, most cheating spouses attempt to hide the details of the affair, thinking that telling the truth will only lead to more problems.

But, concealing the details of the affair, often leads to lingering questions, which if not addressed, are unlikely to go away on their own.  And if questions linger, it can be nearly impossible for a spouse not to dwell on the incident.

Revealing the truth can be painful, but it is necessary when trying to move forward.

Both of these issues, identifying the motivating factors underlying the affair and discussing the details of what happened, are difficult for most couples to manage.  These tasks require tremendous insight and effective communication skills.  If these two issues are not handled effectively, it can lead to further problems - more anger, resentment and frustration.

The Science Of Flirting

Flirting can be one of the more pleasant and exciting aspects of life. It can be a heady experience that causes the heart to beat faster, and the result of a blush and downcast eyes is oddly but undeniably satisfying. The idea that flirtation has become the sole province of females is erroneous; the mere act of tossing someone a significant glance can be considered flirting and, for that reason alone, men play an equal role in the drama.

But this is a dance that requires carefully placed and well-timed steps, and it’s long past time to dispose of your tricks, techniques and pickup lines. Let us turn to science and the ongoing study of social interaction to guide our dance steps. You may be surprised at the amount of knowledge you don’t yet have on the science of flirting.

It all begins with eye contact

Actually, it begins and ends with eye contact, because if she realizes you haven’t focused on her eyes for even two consecutive seconds, she'll lose attention before you even say a word. As the Social Issues Research Center put it: “Your eyes are probably your most important flirting tool… they are also extremely high-powered transmitters of vital social signals.” Eye contact is extraordinarily powerful, so it’s important to walk the line between intensity and subtlety, which is why we usually restrict direct eye contact to only a second or two. This all falls in line with The Player’s very simple method of making more eye contact when listening and averting your gaze a bit more when speaking.

Keep communication honest and balanced

While it remains true that men and women are often at odds in regard to communication, it’s still possible to strike up an engaging, entertaining discussion without posturing. Both sexes can be guilty of bending the truth and altering their behavior  and posturing and untruths (unintentional, though they may be) are often prevalent in a first conversation. This is a bad idea. For example, a man who orients his actions and speech toward seduction, which is nothing more than an invented personality. The same goes for girls who say “I love you” just so they can hear men say the same words. Obviously, the key is to avoid the mind games, keep it simple and, as the article states, “Let the authentic reward come to you.”
Culled from askmen.com